fiNESSA

How many days does it take for Anessa to get behind on blogging? Too few. However, I still plan to post 25 posts about 25 gifts before the first 25 days of days of Christmas are over or so help me (seriously help me, finals week has been thrust upon me like a bad cream-pie-in-face comedy bit).  Rapping AND Wrapping Skills #churchmagazines January 15, 2016 Ichinomiya, Japan A consecrated missionary doesn't just change her behavior, but her nature. And it is only through a changed nature that can make a person able to conquer their Goliaths when they got home. One of my biggest fears about going home is having to face some of my pre-mish Goliaths—bad habits, laziness...selfishness, etc. Being able to overcome that is VERY attractive to me.  My mission changed me.The space between who I was 18 months prior and who I was when I came home felt more like 18 years. Being a missionary becomes a huge part of your identity, but when you get home, you have to learn how to we

Today, I am boasting a gift that  spiritually and physically  brought me to my knees: humility.  This blog post is also dedicated to my wonderful trainer Brooklyn Tanner, formerly known as Brewer Shimai—the poster child for patience. Background: I never rode a bike before my mission. My mission trainer had to teach me. :)  April 30, 2015 Okazaki, Japan Today, we rode a bike more. A week or so ago, Brewer Shimai said that this bike has two wheels—it isn't very stable, but it will work if you stay balanced. As we were practicing today, I thought, "Why would they give us such an imperfect means of transportation?" In other parts of the world, missionaries drive cars.  Then I had the impression that just as this tool was imperfect, I was a tool in the hands of Lord. Thus, I knew I needed to be more patient and try harder. Biking went a lot better. It's as easy as riding a bike, right? Wrong. Several people attempted to teach me how to ride a bi

Okay, today I did a video instead. Creating a video is a lot like singing Beyonce's "Halo"- it sounds effortless...until you actually try it out yourself. At least my lipstick looked great! So, I know that artists shouldn't use disclaimers, but I'm not an artist. I'm a writer. So I claim whatever I want..if I have the evidence to back it up. Unless I'm Donald Trump. Disclaimer: I'm sorry for saying "umm" so many times and for looking away from the camera so many times. Also, I was exhausted, not indifferent when I filmed this. #unscripted Enjoy!

It turns out I have no professional pictures from my mission. I promise I wasn't always a fool. February 16, 2016 Ichinomiya, Japan I have avoided making promises with God on my mission because I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep them. But I have confidence that I can stay on my mission until July 12. I think I finally understand why they say that covenants bring peace, Being able to promise God [that I would complete my mission] brings me immense peace. February 2016 was probably one of the hardest months of my mission, the time that I was closest to packing my bags and heading home early. I felt like Will in Stranger Things , constantly singing “Should I Stay or Should I Go”. Evidently, it was hard for me to feel any sense of security or peace. But when I finally made the decision to complete my mission, peace washed over me. I didn’t know how I would make it through five more months of early mornings, canceled appointments, and shattered hopes, but I didn’t ha

This is how excited I am that you're back for round four! And don't worry, it's a short one.  November 22, 2015 Ichinomiya, Japan I thought about the times when I felt abandoned and alone and felt miserable, about ready to throw everything away...but I think those dark moments make the gospel even more real—it gives [the gospel] more definition. We need those hard times—we need the refiner’s fire. But along the same note, God isn’t going to give up on us. He isn’t going to lure us in with spiritual experiences, string us along and then drop us when He thinks we can do it by ourselves. We aren’t spiders He is dangling above the burning flames of hell— note: this is a reference to an 1800s sermon I read in a high school English class —We are his children. Like I’ve said before, going through my journals has been emotionally taxing. My mission gifted a lot of darkness, but I am grateful for those dark moments. I believe in a Heavenly Father who loves me so

Happy Sunday! I know you’re excited to tear into this blog post like it’s covered in OneDirection wrapping paper. Before you do that, let’s define some jargon for my non-Mormon/non-Judeo-Christian audience. Sacrament Every week, members partake of bread and water that symbolizes the body and blood of Jesus Christ. Taking the sacrament is an awesome weekly opportunity for members to ponder Christ’s sacrifice for us. We can view our sins, repent, and commit to do and be better next week. Even if I can’t attend all of my Sunday church meetings, I make an extra effort to take the sacrament. The whole ordinance is no more than 10 or 15 minutes, but I feel the closest to God during that time. If you’re not Mormon, you can check out a local LDS meetinghouse and attend the meeting for yourself. Atonement You probably know that Jesus Christ died on a cross. This is part of what Mormons call the Atonement. Through Christ’s suffering in the Garden of Gethsemane and death on t

Welcome back! Let's celebrate your reading of this blog post with a photograph that exhibits some of my finer qualities.  Today’s journal entry comes from one of the last days of my mission. I might have even written this on the flight back to America. July 12, 2017 Airspace, Earth “On Sunday, I had to prepare my final talk in Fuji [Yes, THAT Fuji]. Yea, my last day as a missionary, I learned one of the most important lessons of my mission. I’ve been upset that I went to and left Gokiso [one of my past areas] w/o doing much, but I realized that I wasn’t called to Japan to change Japan—to break societal norms & flood areas w/investigators. Rather, I was called to Japan for Japan to change me...That thought touched my heart profoundly. The Lord needed me on His side, He needed me to change, so He sent me to Nagoya.” I believe in being a force for positive change. On my mission, I wanted to change Japan and I wanted to witness all those changes. (They do

Thank you for being bored enough to click the link to this blog post! Thank you and you're welcome. December is the gift-giving month. I have already spent hours probing Pinterest and Amazon, tracking down the perfect Christmas gifts for my loved ones, or at least my liked ones. As I traverse these commercial waters, I recall another journey I undertook, a journey I consider one of the greatest gifts I have ever received (besides the blanket that Andria made me when she had a broken thumb many years ago. It's the warmest thing I own.) That is the gift of my mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon church).  This time three years ago, I was preparing to serve an 18-month volunteer mission in Nagoya, Japan (i.e. watching Netflix and shopping for knee-length skirts).  I went everywhere but the yellow. Why am I even writing this caption? From February 2015 to July 2017, I wore frumpy skirts and floral blouses and shared the gospel of

Much like books sitting on our bookshelves we bought back when Border's was a thing, sometimes our blogs gather dust, slowly losing relevance in the deepest crevices of the Internet. Here is an easy 4-step guide to resurrecting your online presence for a better, blogger you. 1. Apologize for your writing hiatus. This is key not only in reconnecting with your audience, but also salvaging your ego by reaffirming to yourself that you even had readers in the first place. Make it simple, sincere, but be sure to include a dash of self-aggrandizement. Your apology might look something like this: "Dear devoted frequenters of fiNESSA, it has been nearly 2 years and four months since my last blog post; I humbly apologize for that prolonged absence. It is cruel that I have deprived you so long from the very fodder that keeps blood moving through your veins." Notice the sincerity of the apology with the adverb “humbly,” followed by the writer’s assumption th