"Aaah, our first state of Delaware. Established December 7, 1787. What a great place. We should go there."
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| George Washington crossing the Delaware River, though he might not actually be in the state of Delaware. |
Said no one ever.
Let's be real: people don't say this because 1)they don't when any of the states were established and 2)no one knows anything about Delaware. Delaware is one of those states you don't really hear anything about, like Connecticut or Wyoming. It is the red-headed stepchild of America. I am also suprised to say that I have lived in Delaware for three months. This is the last place I would expect to spend a summer. I mean, I know I do a lot of random things, but THIS- this takes the cake. (Takes the cake...where does that even come from?)
Well, get ready to be EDUMACATED. I have compiled a list of questions AND ANSWERS one might ask about Delaware ( completely hypothetical). Because let's face it- you could be kidnapped and wake up in the trunk, only to discover that the kidnapper spared you your life and dumped you in the only WAL-MART parking lot in the entire state of Delaware. Your family has to drive about 8 hours to pick you up, so you might as well do something to occupy time....it could happen.
Where is Delaware?
I read your mind. You don't really know where it is. You probably envisioned a blurry chunk of tiny states brushing up again the Atlantic Ocean. So, here's a map:
What does one do in Delaware?
Great Question! Nothing. But that's the beauty of it! Delaware is so small and so close to so many other states and cities, it mooches off of all them for things to do. The beaches, NYC, DC- all only 2 hours away. Philidelphia? 30 minutes. Baltimore? 1 hour. Isn't that awesome? People come here....to go elsewhere. Kind of like an airport!
What is the weather like in the summer?
HOT HOT HOT and HUMID. It's actually one of Satan's favorite vacation spots (next to Amsterdam and Las Vegas) because it reminds him a lot of home....yes, THAT home. It's an interesting experience. It's so humid it feels like you're swimming...but then you open your eyes, and you're really just walking. (Is this what it feels like to be on drugs.....)
What are the natives like?
Well, they wouldn't know quality customer service if it slapped them in the face and asked for its money back, but they are definitely fashionistas, always sporting the latest trends.
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| photo credit: Trenton Hayes Carter |
Okay, time to be serious. There are few really good dives in Delaware, but El Diablo Burrito is AMAZING. It's so good that even the Californian in front of us in line approved of it. It's kind of like Chipotle- no, it's A LOT like Chipotle. Yummy food, cool workers, and they essentially play all of the music on my Spotify.
What is the most important thing one should know about Delaware?
Okay, time to be serious a second time. NO. SALES. TAX. Not that I keep a written budget, but if I DID- you would probably see a 600% increase in the money I spend at that mall. I know it is only a 6 or 7% discount, but that's better than a 0% discount! There is something great about reading the price tag, and not having to do the math to see how much you are spending. If you're going to have money to blow, you might as well be in Delaware. Also, did I mention that TARGET is part of the mall? These people understand!
So, there you have it. Delaware- the first place on the map, but the last place on your mind. At least now you know why. ;)
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